That's how you feel baby, that's what's up. A hundred forty characters is more than enough.

Hello Dearest Readers,

I write first to inform you that I expect full praise and appreciation from all of you for the fact that I have kept up with my blog EVERY month since I began my JVC journey. Well, except for December. But I spent half of December in Chicago and the other half running around like a headless chicken from one Catholic Charities event to the next.

Now, onto the topics:

1.) Explanation for the title of this blog
2.) Fiesta!!!
3.) Proclaiming the Gospel...or trying to at least!
4.) Get low, get low, get low
5.) Wine tasting and a free ring
6.) Egghead
7.) A tasty dead pigeon

8.) Nicky-wicky

9.) I unintentionally tickled Brother
10.) Trinidad

1.) Explanation of the title of this blog

I recently came up with an ingenious idea for my After School Program kiddos. I decided that I would ask them to tell me their favorite songs. Then, I would look up the lyrics to those songs, copy them into a Word document, take out a couple of the words to the song and put them into a "word bank" on the side of the page, and then print the lyrics out that way. The goal was to encourage the children to practice writing, to pay more attention to what they were actually listening to, and just to challenge them. It has been a hit so far. And I've learned quite a bit about the grade school music scene. One musical group that stuck out more to me than others was one by the name of "Mindless Behavior." The 13 year old wonders of this band have a hit song out called "My Girl" and it is from this melodic sensation that I derived the title to my blog.
Other mind-blowing lines include: "My girl, my girl, she loves me. She hit me all the time, my phone be ringing off hook, like, yeah" and "When you say 'yo,' then I'll say 'hey love.' You hit me with a sad face, what I do? I hit you with a question mark. You send me back a J slash K, said I'm just playing with you."
Genius.

2.) Fiesta!!!
My whole reason for moving to Texas was finally realized last week. I'm being facetious but still, Fiesta is a pretty big deal here in San Antonio. For those who don't know, Fiesta is a two week long celebration spread throughout the city to honor the Battle of the Flowers. Said battle was a triumph for the losers of the Battle of the Alamo and is therefore a much worthier cause for fesitivities and merry-making. Every day during this two week soiree there is a new event, each one more touristy than the next. It can be quite enjoyable though and I will list for you here some of the highlights of the past two weeks:

-El Mercado

The Marketplace in the Downtown area is always filled with stands selling some sort of food or knick knacks. However, during Fiesta the booths abound and the crowds are thick enough on certain days to inhibit movement of any kind. I went three times during the two weeks and was not certain what the big deal was. I suppose the bands performing were interesting but walking around in the heat and paying $5 for a huge cup of ice with a tiny bit of juice in it (called "Aguas Frescas") was not for me.

-NIOSA

Night in Old San Antonio. My housemate's boss gave my housemates and I tickets to this event. It took place in "La Villita" which is a cute little section of the Riverwalk where people set up stands to sell crafts and souvenirs. I found the event especially enjoyable when Megan, Kait, Christina, and I wandered into a gymnasium where elderly folks were performing in tap shoes! They were dancing a mean line dance and clicking away in time to the music. I was impressed to say the least! At one point they invited the masses to engage in well-known dances like the Hokey Pokey and the Chicken Dance. Surprisingly my roommates joined me in the Chicken Dance and the most elaborate conga line I have ever participated in.

-Day Parade

Megan and I decided to walk downtown last Friday (our agencies gave us the day off) to enjoy reading along the Riverwalk. We had considered attending the Fiesta Day Parade but concluded that without tickets, we would never be able to find a spot close enough to the parade to see anything worthwhile. However, as we walked to the Riverwalk, we happened to pass the parade route and found an entire section of empty seats right on the edge of the street. We looked around in disbelief and hesitated for a good ten minutes before quickly parking our bottoms in those coveted seats. No one bothered us...nor did anyone standing behind us follow suit. It was strange. But the parade was fabulous! Much better than Chicago's St. Patrick's Day Parade, I'm afraid. I am a marching band aficionado and enjoyed watching the high school bands pass by in all their glory. I also enjoyed seeing the horses wearing cowboy boots and witnessing a rather strange tradition. As the "Duchesses" passed by on their gaudy floats, the crowd would shout, "Show us your shoes!!" and the girls would lift up their intricately adorned dresses to reveal a variety of footwear- cowboy boots, Converse, slippers, etc. I didn't really understand it, nor did I understand how those girls were voted "Duchesses." Their titles ranged from "Duchess of Historical Reverence," to "Duchess of Familial Pride" and included other random attributes that I suppose they possessed. Whateva! One part of the parade that left Megan and I with mixed feelings was when the Border Patrol passed by. I wasn't sure how to feel about honoring such a corrupt system...

-Night Parade

Ricky got tickets to the Night Parade and so Megan, Ricky, and I attended it and sat four rows back from the street. It was another impressive parade- complete with creative displays of glow sticks on the marching bands' instruments, spotlights as big as Smart Cars, and Christmas lights wrapped around people's bodies. The theme had to do with holidays and so we saw many a Christmas and Mardi Gras float pass by.

-I missed the River Parade and the Oyster Bake... but the whole experience that I did have was quite enjoyable. Thank you San Antonio for showing me a good time.

3.) Proclaiming the Gospel...or trying to at least!
I directed some teens in performing an interpretation of the Palm Sunday Gospel. I may have mentioned this before but I'll repeat it anyway- I volunteer every Sunday as a Youth Minister for my church's Youth Group. I find it rewarding- especially when I am given projects to facilitate. My first project was the Proclamation of the Gospel last Sunday. I was told to read the Palm Sunday Gospel and direct the children in reenacting it without using spoken word. So I had to choose music to play while the children were presenting the story to the congregation. A few weeks before the date of the "show" I presented the idea to the youth and took down names of which students wanted to be which characters. Then we rehearsed a bit.

The Sunday before the show date, we met again and half of the children who had been at the first rehearsal were missing. This meant that I had to re-assign roles and practice with a group of kids not familiar with what we were doing. However, the new actors rose to the challenge and performed an impressively smooth dress rehearsal.

Confident that the Palm Sunday presentation would be a success, I woke up leisurely on the day of our performance and strolled to church. Ok, perhaps I didn't stroll. In fact, the pressure was on to make the proclamation amazing. This pressure could be attributed to the fact that last year's proclamation was riddled with laughter, irreverence, and tomfoolery, which obviously upset the priests and caused them apprehension when considering allowing the students to perform again this year. However, my confidence from the smooth dress rehearsal allowed a lesser degree of nervousness on my part.

Then, I entered the church and discovered that yet again, there was a fresh batch of faces staring at me and awaiting direction. This was an hour before mass started. Three of the students had never practiced, one had never even heard of what we were doing until 20 minutes earlier, several of the kids had only been to the first practice weeks earlier, some were still missing, and our Jesus character had missed the most recent rehearsal. So I quickly put my director's cap on and tried to whip those cats into shape! We did a less than promising run-through of the show and then mass started. I found out later that I looked completely panicked standing in the choir section awaiting the Proclamation.

After the second reading, I swiftly set up the music for the show and allowed it to flow. Well, it was fine. Really, it went pretty well. A few snafus here and there but nothing too detrimental to our reputation as a youth group! At one point the student who had never heard of the Proclamation before (Carlos) looked at me with a complete "What the heck do I do??" look. I tried to mime for him that he was supposed to point at Jesus on the cross and ridicule him. However, Carlos took my actions to mean "Take Jesus down from the cross NOW!" so he ran up to Jesus (standing on a chair with his arms outstretched in agony) and reached out to grab his middle. Then, looking around and realizing that none of the other guards were going to help him, he stepped back, then reached forward again, then stepped back. It almost appeared to be that he was dancing... awkwardly. I almost couldn't contain my laughter. But luckily I was concealed behind a pillar in the church where none of the priests could see me.

By Jove, the show went fine. And then the 1pm mass' rendition (same kids, same deal, different congregation) was even better! And the priest who had complained so strongly about last year's show went out of his way to compliment me on a job well done.

4.) Get low, get low, get low

Last Sunday, after a Passover meal with the Youth Group, I decided to play basketball with Ricky and some of the youth. As we perfected our lay-ups, a procession of women and Father Marshall came by us in the parking lot. One particularly quacky Jesus fan came over to me and the other basketball players and tried to convince us that Jesus was REALLY present in the monstrance that the priest was toting. She "asked" if we would kneel as "Jesus" passed us. We didn't really have a choice so I scraped my bare knees on the gravel as that band of fanatics paraded by. Then the woman gave us each a rosary and some prayer cards and tried to convince us to visit Jesus more often.

I guess I just found it a bit strange that Fr. Marshall and his ladies were so convinced that Jesus was encapsulated in that bright golden star on the end of a stick. If they were so intent on spreading Jesus around to the community, then why didn't they go out and show his love through their actions? Visiting the homebound, bringing food to those who have none, talking to members of the community to see what kinds of services would be beneficial? It's something that I struggle with quite a bit with my faith and my involvement with the church. I find great merit in taking time out of the week to pray to God, but I think the Church should have a responsibility to act out its faith... meaning loving and caring for others, not shoving Jesus' cocooned presence in a monstrance down people's throats. But that's just my opinion of the hour.

5.) Wine tasting and a free ring
I was asked to volunteer at a fundraiser for Catholic Charities' residential facility for homeless mothers and their children. It was a wine-tasting and my job entailed helping rich people purchase jewelry from a very talented jewelress (female jewelry maker??). I won't go into detail about my duties (boooooring) but I will say that I became fast friends with the jewelress and she thanked me at the end of the night by allowing me to select one of the rings that she had made. Boy, does she know the way to my heart! I adore rings. So, I guess I thought it was blog-worthy to tell this story. The story of how I obtained a snazzy home-made ring from an Austinite named Pat.

6.) Egghead
Can someone please tell me- does this tradition exist in Chicago? Allow me to detail a custom that prevails over San Antonio... cascarones!!!

1. ) Purchase an egg

2.) Crack off one of the ends of the egg and allow all of the runny interior to slide out

3.) Wash out the eggshell (and dry it)

4.) Fill the eggshell with confetti

5.) Glue tissue paper over the hole on the one end of the egg

6.) Find someone you dislike

7.) Smash the egg onto that person's head

8.) Run away

Sounds fun, huh? Well, I had seen it done here and there earlier in the year and didn't think much of it. However, now that we are swiftly approaching Easter, the prevalence of these egg bombs has increased ten-fold. And I became a victim for the first time on Sunday. After youth group, one of the kids invited me outside. I saw her holding something behind her back and I knew that Ricky (also a youth minister) had purchased a couple dozens of the cascarones, so I told the young girl that I would not be fooled. As I walked toward her telling her that she'd never get me, Ricky jumped out and smashed a cascarón on my head. How lovely. You've never known life until you've had eggshells and confetti adorning your hair and sweater. After that, another student crept up on me and not only smashed the egg on my head, but he rubbed it in to ensure that I'd experience difficulty removing it. Gross!

I don't know how the tradition came about but I don't find it very enjoyable. I'd prefer to poke two holes in the egg, blow out the innards, paint it, and hang it on a tree. Just sayin'...

7.) A tasty dead pigeon

I was minding my own business at the After School Program two days ago. I stood chatting jovially with the students and enjoying the weather. Then, a student who I had not seen in weeks approached me... with a dead pigeon. He was holding a mangled pigeon by one of its wings. He was holding a repulsive corpse of bones and feathers six inches from my face and was simultaneously chewing on something. The interaction went this way (most of it was in Spanish but I've translated it to English for my non-Spanish-speaking readers):

Student: (approaches with dead pigeon, chewing on something) MMM, chicken!

Me: (in total shock, horror, and disgust) N n n no, that's not chicken, that's a a a... Oh my God, what are you doing with that thing??

Student: It's my lunch, miss! Yum! Want some?

Me: No, I do not want any of that- that is a dead pigeon and it carries diseases!! Throw that away immediately!!

Student: (laughing hysterically) Aww, fine, miss. (throws pigeon at my feet)

Me: Oh no no no, not there! Throw that in a garbage can! And wash your hands, who knows what kinds of diseases that bird suffered from!

Student: Diseases? No way! (picks up bird and throws it in the trash... walks away)

(15 minutes later)

Student: (advances towards me with hand outstretched) High five, miss!

Me: (not really paying attention, slaps five with him)

Student: HahaHA! I got bird diseases all over your hand!!! (runs away)

I cannot begin to express my repugnance at the whole experience.

8.) Nicky-wicky

Nicholas, a former Jesuit Volunteer who lived in my current abode last year, has been staying with us since Monday. It's been great having him around and swapping stories about his past experiences and our current escapades. One thing that really got me when Nicholas first arrived was Brother Gus' reaction to him. (Incase I haven't mentioned who Brother Gus is before- he is a 72 year old religious brother who lives next door to my community and adores spending time with my roommates and I) The minute Nicholas entered our home, Brother Gus shot out of his chair and was hugging Nicholas. He called him "Nicky Wicky," "Nick the Wick," and "Nickaboy" throughout the whole first hour of reacquainting himself with his old friend. When Brother sat down with Nicholas standing near him, Brother couldn't stop holding on to Nicholas' arm, patting him on the back, and beaming at him. It was very sweet.

9.) I unintentionally tickled Brother

Funny moment. My community and I had a dinner last Tuesday with Nicholas, Mary Kate (she also lived in our home last year as a JV), a friend of one of the priests- G, and Brother Gus. At one point, I was telling Brother about how Janine had cooked up some delicious beans for the household the day before, but she warned me that they were spicy. Brother knows that I can't handle spicy things and so he asked me how they were for me. I told him that after I put the fire out in my mouth, the beans were great! For some reason, he found this to be HILARIOUS and couldn't stop laughing for a good minute or two. Brother is usually the one making jokes so it was nice to give our ol' friend a chance at some unadulterated laughter.

And I said "tickled" in the title because that's how Brother described his experience of finding my comment humorous. I tickled him.

10.) Trinidad

Trinidad is a young boy at the After School Program. He is about 9 or 10 years old and suffers from ADHD, Dyslexia, and anger management issues. His mother does not appear to value school and allows him to stay home too frequently. He came to the ASP the other day and sought out my assistance with his math homework. He was working with double digit addition and subtraction. I tried my best to help him but it was a nearly lost cause.

-First, he didn't know basic addition or subtraction (we're talking 1+4 and thereabouts).

-Second, he didn't quite understand the concept of counting with one's fingers (which I acknowledge is perhaps not the best way to teach math but I figured we had to start SOMEwhere).

-Third, if he didn't immediately understand what I was trying to tell him, he would enlist the services of a fellow student...a.k.a. he used a strategy in which he told a student "I betcha don't know what 39+45 is!" and it was 100% effective in providing him with the swift and correct answer. However, I worked hard to put a stop to that method as quickly as I could.

So, basically I was bewildered by the fact that a 9 year old child could be completely stumped by such simple mathematical equations. Who failed him? His mother? His teachers? I'm fairly certain that in a home and school environment that focused solely on him and working with his special needs, he would be able to add 39 and 45. So, what needs to be done? Can this gap in his education be filled? How can I help him? He has such little patience and I have far too many duties to spend my entire time tutoring him. I feel helpless. Especially now that he has been suspended from the program for hitting me. He came up behind me on Thursday and gave my back about three swift whacks before I was able to put a stop to it. He was happy to see me and was trying to show his enthusiasm but unfortunately one of the directors of the program told me that rough behavior of that sort just cannot be tolerated at the ASP.

Well, it's Easter tomorrow and I have more stories to tell... issues to ponder... people to thank, but I will leave you all with many well wishes and a promise to continue with my blog soon!

All the best :)